


What If

by JoanOfSnark16



Category: Twilight Series - All Media Types
Genre: Better Than Canon, F/F, Lesbian Character
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-09-08
Updated: 2020-09-13
Packaged: 2021-03-06 20:01:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 6,743
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26354647
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JoanOfSnark16/pseuds/JoanOfSnark16
Summary: What if Bella had come to her senses and realized that Alice is infinitely better than Edward. What if Alice was her mate instead of Edward? Here you will find different quotes from the books that I have taken and turned into Alice/Bella moments. Some are more heavily Bellice than others.
Relationships: Alice Cullen/Bella Swan, Edward Cullen/Bella Swan
Comments: 9
Kudos: 55





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Originally posted on fanfiction in 2008, it is here for your viewing pleasure all revamped (hah) and ready to go.
> 
> In other news, I still suck at summaries.

_He turned to Alice._

" _Can Jasper handle this?"_

" _Give him some credit Edward. He has been doing very, very well, all things considered."_

 _Can_ _**you** _ _handle this?" he asked._

_And graceful little Alice pulled back her lips in a horrific grimace and let loose with a guttural snarl that had me cowering against the seat in terror._

_Edward smiled at her. "But keep your opinions to yourself," he muttered suddenly._

** Twilight pg. 388 **

I stare at them confused. What did Edward mean? Now isn't the time to be keeping things from me. I glance at Alice only to see her shake her head slightly. Uneasily, I drop the subject and look away.

I turn back to Edward as he moves to stand beside me.

"Bella, my love, Alice and Jasper are going to be taking you away from here." He says kissing my hair, running his fingers through it. I make sure that my cringe is internal as the guilt and irritation of his affectionate actions and nickname wash over me. I haven't been his for a while.

After the initial newness to the relationship and revelation of what he and his family were ended, his aura of perfection had dissipated and revealed a man that loathes himself and what he is. I would love Edward forever, but I can't love him enough for the both of us. His outlook is exhausting and was starting to cause problems -- even if I am the only to see that. On top of that, I feel trapped which only adds to the storm of emotions that has been haunting me lately. I can feel resentment and anger bubbling up at small arguments and little interactions. I have started to hate myself for resenting him and our relationship simply because I feel I can't leave because of how happier he is with me -- or at least, everyone says he is.

I am brought out of my thoughts when Edward shakes my arm slightly. "Bella, are you alright? I can go with you, if you are worried." He says concern lacing his voice and I offer him a small smile with a shake my head.

"I'm fine. Are we leaving now?" I ask, looking down. It is a moment before he answers and I can feel his eyes on me.

"Yes." He kisses me one last time, before he turns away. I can't help the sigh that escaped my lips and I crawl into the back of the car that Jasper is driving. Before I can close the door, Edward places one arm across the top of the frame and leans in close, his voice a whisper despite everyone being able to hear him. "Bella, don't worry," he traces my cheek with his fingers before cupping my face, "Jasper and Alice will be there with you while the others and I take care of everything else. You don't have to do anything. This will be over and in a couple of days we will be back at school like nothing has happened." His soothing tone causes irritation to bubble in my chest and I pull away from his hand meeting his surprised look with a glare.

"I'm not a child, Edward, you don't have to pretend that this isn't serious. You can't control everything and that bothers you, hence why you are sending Jasper and Alice with me. I don't need bodyguards, I can take care of myself." The words are ridiculous even to my own ears but Edward doesn't call me out on my lie.

"It is a precaution, Bella, just in case." I offer a huff in response and reach past him for the door. Wordlessly, he steps back and watches as we drive off.

After being on the road for about fifteen minutes, I can feel Alice's worried yet cautious gaze on me. I ignore her and keep my attention focused on the passing scenery. It doesn't take long before the space to my left is filled and I can feel her cool body pressing up against mine. She grasps my left hand in both of hers, and I can feel her leaning into me slightly. I continue to ignore her, but I can feel the tears pricking at my eyes.

One tear rolls down my cheek and I go to wipe it away but my hand is stopped by one of hers. Her golden eyes shine with concern and sadness that causes the dam to break and tears to flow steadily down my cheeks. Over my hiccuping I hear her breathe a quiet 'Oh, Bella, sweetheart' and my emotions come tumbling out of my mouth, the stress and worry from the past few days refusing to be bottled anymore.

"Alice, your family is danger because of me, and there is nothing I can do." I say, finally angling my body to her. I hear her sigh and she squeezes my hands.

"They will be fine, Bella, there is only two of them. We can handle it." She says gently, wiping away more of my tears. Her soothing tone is similar to Edward's, but with none of the condescension -- Alice is nothing but genuine. I shake my head and turn back toward the window. I know that they will be perfectly fine... in my head, they are more than capable of taking care of themselves, but if one of them got hurt. I would feel so guilty, more so than I do now. "Bella." Alice says softly before pulling me against her and sliding us across the seats, so that I am lying on her with my back resting on her chest.

We stay silent for a while, Alice rubbing my arm gently with one hand, the other running through my hair. The action is soothing and hypnotic in its frequency and I find it difficult to keep my eyes open, the restless nights of late catching up with me.

\--

When I next open my eyes, I am greeted with a room so bland it can only belong to a cheap motel. I sit up quickly and notice Jasper staring at me from the chair across the room. I clear my throat awkwardly when he doesn't look away.

"Um, where's Alice?" I ask my voice thick from sleep.

"She went to get you something to eat." Jasper says, still staring intently at me. I look away, not able to hold his gaze and starting to feel uncomfortable. I glance back at him when he sighs and moves to the bed across from me, confusion taking discomfort's place. "You know that Edward and everyone else will be alright, right? When all of this is over you and Edward will back to normal." As soon as he finishes guilt rushes through me and Jasper continues to stare but with a tilted head, something akin to puzzlement flickering across his face. "Bella, why are you guilty? He is going to be fine." I take a breath to answer, but nothing comes out when I open my mouth. I just look down at the floor and shake my head, sadness coursing through me. "Bella?" I look back up at Jasper when he says my name, concern evident in his tone.

"I don't think we can go back to normal, Jasper," I offer him a weak smile, "I don't think we should go back at all." I watch various emotions flit across and play with his features and it amuses me, briefly, that the empath is struggling to settle on a feeling. "I feel guilty because he still loves me… but I don't think that I love him, at least not in the same way, and I know our relationship doesn't work, not with how things are, with how we are. Just... I don't want to hurt him. Like all of you keep saying, he is so much happier. I don't want to ruin that." I confess, gaze dropping to the tan carpet.

"I thought something was different." My head snaps back up. "I can feel emotions, Bella. I could sense when your emotions changed towards him." Jasper studies a moment, seemingly deciding what to say next. "You love him," he begins carefully, "but the adoration and awe are not there any more." He says looking at me gently. I sigh and nod, looking back at the ground. "Bella, falling out of love with someone isn't uncommon. People do it every day. Everyone acts like it doesn't happen and that there is something wrong if someone's feelings change. Trust me," his smile is wry, "I feel it all of the time." He offers me a knowing look before speaking, "especially as people change and grow. Some relationships grow apart, others closer together. It is natural. Especially if the other person is pretty set in their self-damning ways." I chuckle humorlessly and look up at Jasper who is cursed with knowing this better than anyone.

"You don't." I say and Jasper tilts his head again. "Vampires don't fall out of love." I clarify and he merely arches an eyebrow.

"Yes they do. The time for the relationship just tends to be longer."

"I thought mates were for forever?"

"Ah, mates. Those are different. Mates are for forever, but just because a vampire has a mate does not mean that they haven't loved someone else in their life. Most of them have multiple relationships before they find their mate -- if they do at all. It just means they haven't loved the right one yet... much like you haven't. Bella," he continues, "you have nothing to be ashamed about. Edward loves you yes, but he will get over it. The fact of the matter is that you are not his mate." I look at him but he shakes his head, "that was pretty evident from the beginning, it is just something that we know, but that never stopped him from loving you, it never does. It didn't for Alice and I for the first few decades, but now we are more of just best friends really. One day we shall find our other halves, just as Edward will." He smiles gently. I go to say something when the door opens and Alice walk through it, holding a muffin. She stops and looks at us.

"What? What's wrong?" she asks setting the muffin down and rushes over to my side.

"Nothing, Alice, just clearing a few things up." Jasper says smiling gently at her before moving towards the door. "I'm going to go look around, maybe find a payphone, I'll be back shortly." He steps from the room and silence reigns again.

It takes a moment for me to tear my eyes away from the wall and my focus from my thoughts but when I do Alice greets me with a lopsided smile.

"It is nice seeing you two bond, finally. It is about time." Her words are teasing and I roll my eyes. "What were you two talking about?" She asks, her curiosity poorly restrained, and I weigh my words carefully.

"Jasper was telling me that you and him are not mates and that the whole of Forks High is wrong when it comes to you two," I offer finally and Alice giggles.

"Did he? Well," she says her voice nonchalant, "he's right. We haven't been together since before all of your classmates were born." The thought should be strange but I find it an acceptable explanation.

"We also talked about Edward," I begin slowly and I can see the glint of amusement lighting Alice's eyes fade only to be replaced by genuine care and curiosity, "and how I think that when all of this is over I don't think we will be together anymore." I finish and watch Alice's expression closely, shockingly worried at her response. Instead, her features turn uncharacteristically neutral leaving nothing to be deciphered. When she doesn't speak my nerves get the better of my and I hurry to fill the silence. "Not that I don't love Edward, I do! I just realized that it isn't romantic love. Thinking on it, my relationship with Edward felt like one with a celebrity. I was pretty close to starstruck and once that wore off and I could see more than all of the good, he wasn't nearly as perfect as I made him out to be." I flounder around for more words as Alice continues to sit in silence. "We just... the relationship isn't something I think will be good for either of us in the long run." I finish weakly but refuse to look away from Alice's unchanging gaze.

"Are you happy?" She asks suddenly and I stumble a response.

"Yes, no... at times?" I stop and take a deep, steadying breath. "Edward deserves to have someone love him for all of him. I've learned I can't do that and it wouldn't be fair to either of us for this to continue. He deserves someone that is better for him and so do I, we both would be happiest without one another." I finish, my words strong, and I my own words finally get through to me. No matter how happy Edward is with me, he would be happier with someone else and because I do love him I have to do what is best for the both of us.

"You're right." Alice says, a full smile splitting her face. "You and Edward both deserve the best. If you are not the best for one another then you both deserve the chance to find who is." Her smile takes on a touch of sadness, "but I am sorry that it hasn't worked out.'

"Don't be, I wouldn't trade any of this, any of you guys, for the world." Any sadness is wiped away as Alice pulls me in for a crushing hug.

"Do you know what this means?" She whispers in my ear and I shrug. "This means I get to finally be a wing-woman!" She pulls away with a kiss to my cheek and flits across the room only to grab a pad of paper and a pencil before flitting back. "We will have to go shopping, you'll need new outfits for dates and pre-dates. I can't have you meeting any prospects dressed like," she looks up from her paper and her eyebrows pinch down, "that." I throw her my best unimpressed glare.

"You might want to hold off until I actually break up with Edward," I say flatly and she winces, offering me a sheepish smile.

"Right, well I, for one, am happy to be spending more time with you!" Her words cause an unexpected smile and warmth to bloom in my chest that I eventually recognize and happiness and affection. I open my mouth to respond when the door opens and Jasper comes in.

"Esme is back at Forks, she said that the redhead hasn't tried to go after Charlie. Carlisle and Edward lost track of the other vampire so they are going to come down here soon." He says a small smile aimed in my direction and I can't help but return it. My stomach rumbles audibly and my cheeks heat up instantly. I ignore the quiet chuckles from Alice and Jasper and stand to grab the muffin left forgotten by Alice earlier. I go to take a bite out of it when I hear Jasper say Alice's name with a touch of urgency. I turn to see a blank look covering her eyes and her hand moving fervently across a piece of paper, drawing something. I move closer to see her drawing a ballet studio. A memory comes to mind and I gasp quietly. Once Alice is free from her vision she scans over her creation, lips pressed into a line and brows pulled down.

"It's a ballet studio." I say quietly. "Like the one used to go to one when I was little. The shape of it is the same."

"Are you sure it is the same one?" Jasper asks. I shake my head.

"They all look alike, the mirrors, the bar. The shape is really the only thing that reminds me of the one I use to go to. It should have nothing to do with me. I haven't been there in almost ten years and I'm not even sure the same person owns it."

\--

End.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sort of a pre-relationship chapter, I guess. My dudes, this is so different from the one on fanfiction I don't even know, but this is what happens when you write crap at 3:30 in the morning.
> 
> I have more chapters in the works, but I am happy for any suggestions ^-^
> 
> Hope you enjoy!


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A much longer one, phew! Please let me know if you like it, what I should change, any suggestions for quotes, so on and so forth.
> 
> Thank you for all of the support so far, it means the world!! Have a good one!

" _Hey, Edward!" Alice called enthusiastically. She ran down the stairs, a streak of black hair and white skin, coming to a sudden and graceful stop in front of me. Carlisle and Esme shot warning glances at her, but I liked it. It was natural—for her, anyway._

" _Hi, Bella!" Alice said, and she bounced forward to kiss my cheek. If Carlisle and Esme had looked cautious before, they now looked staggered. There was shock in my eyes, too, but I was also very pleased that she seemed to approve of me so entirely. I was startled to feel Edward stiffen at my side. I glanced at his face, but his expression was unreadable._

" _You do smell nice, I never noticed before," she commented, to my extreme embarrassment._

**Twilight pg. 323 Part One**

My brain stops, all thought processes ceasing. I don't say anything for a few moments simply because I lack the ability. The spot where her cool lips met my skin tingles, similar to the feeling you have with extremely minty gum, but the rest of me is warm, like I've stepped outside into sunlight. I shake my head in attempt to clear it and glance at Edward who is focused solely on Alice. I thought it was supposed to be extremely difficult to be around me? Between Edward's, albeit dramatic, response and Carlisle and Esme's reaction just now... well, maybe Alice just has better control. 

Edward is still watching Alice intently and looking completely like they are having some sort of silent conversation. I clear my throat and gently pull at Edward's unmoving arm, but he doesn't acknowledge me. Only when I glance at Alice and our eyes meet does he seem to snap out of whatever trance he was in. Thankfully, Jasper walks in and provides some sort of distraction from whatever is going on between the two.

"Hi, Jasper." I say quietly, offering a small wave. He smiles slightly, wrapping his arm around Alice's shoulders, who reciprocates by wrapping an arm around his waist. Something in my chest tightens, but I ignore it and shift slightly closer to Edward.

"Hello, Bella." Jasper says, and I can hear a faint southern accent in his tone. I look around the house again, noticing that neither Emmett nor Rosalie are here. It was unlikely that everyone would welcome me with open arms, or a kiss on the cheek as the case may be, but still, I found myself disappointed.

"You have a beautiful home. Thank you for having me over." I say, embarrassed and suddenly remembering my manners.

"Oh, thank you, dear, it's nice having someone over." Esme says sincerely and I blush. I glance at Carlisle and find his attention elsewhere, mostly on Edward. When Edward nods, I look away from their private conversation. I guess that is what happens when you've lived with someone for so long.

"So, Jasper," I start particularly awkward, "Edward tells me you have a gift." Jasper seems to study me a moment before he nods.

"I do. I can feel and manipulate emotions. For example, right now you are feeling very nervous and shy." He pauses and turns to Alice. "While Alice here is almost vibrating with happiness." Jasper says smiling fondly at his wife.

"That seems almost like a cheat, of course I would feel nervous and shy, I imagine most people do when meeting others for the first time. And Alice, well, she's your... girlfriend...thing. You would know her better than anyone." Alice's appalled 'thing?!' puts a tilt to Jasper's lips.

"Fair enough, tell me then, why do you feel sorry for me?" I stare in surprise. "You do feel sorry for me, do you not?" Teasing colors his words and it allows me to speak again.

"I'm just thinking how hard it must be for you to deal with everyone at school. I know that my emotions for myself can be overwhelming at times, I can't imagine what it would be like to feel them all." I pause and another thought occurs to me. "Is that why," I pause, not sure how to phrase my question without coming off as being horribly rude, "you have more trouble than others coping to your guys' lifestyle? Edward had mentioned that you were doing great, but that it was still hard for you. Because you can feel their thirst, too?" I ask, rapid-firing my words in embarrassment.

Silence follows my rambling and I just know my mother would smack me if she knew of the social error I had just made. "I mean, I'm sorry, it's none of my business, I shouldn't have asked." I apologize quickly, finding the pattern of the tile at my feet wholly interesting. A cold hand grasps my own and my eyes snap to honey-colored ones that have suddenly appeared. Alice is next to me, holding my hand in her own, with a beautiful smile gracing her features.

"No, there is no need to apologize. We were simply unaware," her gaze momentarily flicks up to Edward, "that you were aware of our struggles. But, to answer your question, yes. That is why he has more difficulty adjusting."

"You shouldn't feel sorry for me either. It helps me to tell when people are upset or sad." Jasper says, also looking towards Edward, "or when feelings are true and pure." I glance nervously between them, tension lacing their tones and the air between them. Edward starts to vibrate and his brows are pulled down, lips forming a very harsh line, and I desperately search for a new topic.

"Oh, um, Alice. Edward tells me you can see the future… sort of." I say and sigh in relief when everyone focuses on Alice, not missing Jasper's eyes on me and his brief frown.

"It's more premonitions, really. The future changes with peoples' decisions. I wouldn't be able to see your future unless you decided to do something. That's why I might see ten different outcomes for one situation; it all depends on the decisions that are made." She says squeezing my hand.

"Cool." I say smiling at her, and she giggles.

"It can be… it's good for school and all that." Edward clears his throat, voice verging on hostile, and pulls me away from Alice, our hands falling apart.

"Edward, can we talk in my office?" Carlisle requests politely, his tone suggesting he isn't asking -- I had forgotten that he and Esme were still there. Edward nods, head hanging slightly. When they move towards what I assume is Carlisle's office, Esme ushers us to the living room.

"Bella, dear, can I get you something to drink?" Esme asks kindly, ever the perfect hostess.

"Um, water please." I say, feeling the need to be the perfect guest. Alice plops down next to me on the couch, Jasper sitting next to her. I look at both of them in concern. "Are you sure I haven't crossed any lines. Edward was growling an awful lot. I didn't mean to cause… whatever I did." I say softly.

"Silly human, you didn't do anything. Edward is just temperamental is all and never learned how to share." Alice says, words light but lacking her usual bubbly tone.

"Especially what isn't his to start with." Jasper mumbles. I cock my head to the side and stare questioningly at Alice.

"What? What isn't his?" Jasper goes to speak but Alice beats him to it.

"Nothing, actually. What they are talking about isn't anyone's property." She sighs and looks into my eyes. "Vampires, by nature, are very selfish creatures. Even if something isn't technically ours, if we claim it, we feel that no one else is allowed to have it. And Edward is selfish, even for a vampire." She finishes with a roll of her eyes and smiles, but I can tell that it is forced. Edward's reappearance stops any further conversation especially when he gives me a hand up from the couch and wraps a possessive arm around my waist. With a sharp glare to the other two vampires, he leads me to another room.

"Carlisle and I need to go out for a few hours. I apologize for cutting this visit short." He says and smiles crookedly but something is off, his tone is flat but his eyes and hands are angry. Part of me wants to stay, maybe wait for him to get back.

"She could stay, you know. As you said, you won't be gone long. Alice, Esme, and I could keep her company until you do." Jasper’s words come from the doorway but I don't look his direction. Sadness momentarily flits across Edward's features before he closes his eyes and sighs quietly. I swear I hear him mutter 'you just never give up' but it is so quiet, I must have imagined it.

"Yeah, okay. I'm positive Alice would love to spend some time with you. I'll only be gone for a few hours but I'll have my phone so don't hesitate to call me if you need anything." He says with a very small, bitter smile.

"Edward, have I done something wrong?" I ask hesitantly, my gut screaming that something is going on here and I just want things to be normal. Well, their normal anyway. "I mean I can go home if it is more convenient for everyone. I don't mind." Edward just shakes his head and a real smile twitches at his lips.

"You can do nothing wrong, Bella. I just need some time with Carlisle to clear my head. And before you ask again, I promise none of this is your fault. As my siblings so charmingly put it, I am selfish. Again, I just need some time to think is all. I'll be back." Edward punctuates the end of his sentence with a kiss to my forehead. He turns and only then do I see Carlisle in the doorway, a sympathetic look in his eyes.

"We won't be gone too long, Bella. I'll have him back shortly." Carlisle says with a kind smile. I do my best to offer him one back and in a blink of an eye they are gone. Completely confused as to what part of the conversation I am clearly missing, I am unsure of what I should do. I want to go back to Alice, but something in the back of my mind is telling me that that is part of the problem. I'm left with my indecision for only a moment more before Alice is at my side, looping her arm in mine with a hesitant upturn to her lips. She pulls me gently up the stairs and I follow willingly, not sure what else to do. We sit on the bed in what is clearly her room, and I can feel her staring intently at me.

"Edward says that none of this is my fault, but I can't help but think that it is." I say abruptly, finally returning the pixie's gaze. Alice studies me for only a moment before shaking her head and grabbing my hand. That same mint-like, pleasant, tingling sensation shoots up my arm and I feel a smile slide into place.

"Bella, I promise, none of this is your fault. It happens," she says gently before ducking closer to meet my eyes, "are you alright?" She asks with such care that it startles me. I sigh.

"I don't know, Alice, I'm just so confused." I say and notice that I am rubbing her knuckles with my thumb, I force myself to stop. "I don't know what is going on with Edward, he hasn't been this... moody since we first met. And there is all of this conversation that _I know_ is going on, but I don't know _what_ is going on." I drop her hand and move off of the bed, pacing across her room and back, thinking out loud rather than talking with her. "And you, and Edward, and Jasper seem to have this silent-but-not-silent argument going on and everyone is saying it doesn't have to do with me, but it feels like it does." I continue pacing, running a hand through my hair. "And I like Edward, and I should have wanted to go home, but here I am wanting to talk to you." I heave a frustrated sigh. "Look," I stop short and turn to face the small vampire, "I don't know what is going on. All I know is that this is some vampire-y business that I have no business being involved in. Not to mention it is coming between you guys and that isn't something I can deal with. Family first, right? So... I'm going to go. I'll be sure to text Edward that I left."

"Bella?" Alice sounds almost hurt and something in my gut twists uncomfortably.

"Don't worry, Alice, I am happy to walk home. I just feel that whatever is going on between you guys needs to be settled before I start coming around again." To her credit, Alice slips off of her bed with a nod and walks with me towards the front door.

"Okay, Bella, but you aren't going to walk, Edward would kill me, I can drive you." Not really wanting to walk a couple of miles in the rain, I nod. "Fantastic, come on. You can text Edward in the car." I follow her to the garage and stare open-mouthed at the cars collected there. "Come on, Bella, you'll catch flies if you aren't careful." My jaw clicks shut and I follow her to a large Jeep of which she has no problem gracefully climbing in.

"So... nice cars." I say and Alice giggles, the sound causing a smile to split my face.

"Rosalie would comment on the eloquence of your statement and how underwhelming it is, but I'll just say 'thank you'." I chuckle, running my hand through my hair again, self consciously.

"I wouldn't have taken you for a Jeep type of girl."

"Oh please, this is Emmett's car. He is working on getting me a new one since he totaled my old one." She says dismissively.

"Is he okay?" The look Alice shoots me has blood rushing my cheeks immediately, causing my face to burn. "Right. So, what is he getting you?"

"I don't know," she says with a long-suffering sigh, "he won't tell me." She pulls out of the driveway and onto the gently winding road. "What about you, you have a truck don't you?" I can see the slight wrinkle to her nose and while it is cute, I feel defensive about my baby.

"Yes, I do. And she runs great." I know my tone is challenging but she laughs it off.

"Bella, relax, I'm not attacking your truck." I feel my shoulders drop a little bit from my ears and relax slightly. "If you ever want some tune-up work done on it, Emmett would be more than happy to assist."

"Somehow, I doubt he would appreciate you volunteering him." Alice waves her hand flippantly.

"He won't mind. He likes working on cars. He is thinking of being a mechanic the next time we move." That causes some vampire questions to be raised but I hesitate in asking, Edward wasn't really comfortable talking about it. "Bella," Alice says gently, her eyes light, "go ahead and ask, I won't be offended."

"It's not that, I'm just not sure if you would be comfortable talking about it." She tilts her head in response and I shrug.

"Edward didn't like talking about it, would do what he could to change the topic. The only reason he told me about your struggle with thirst was to warn me off. So I figured that it just is a vampiric social no-no." That causes her to laugh, a bright smile lighting her features, and I’m starting to see that Alice is the antithesis to Edward.

"Edward is a social no-no, vampiric or otherwise. I love my brother but he likes to brood and all things that come with it. Even has the depressed artist bit down. All joking aside, he is a masterful pianist. Anyway, I have no problem talking about it, there is no reason not to. Fire away!" Admittedly, Alice's openness about the subject is refreshing, asking Edward about things is less than successful at best.

“How often do you guys have to move?”

“That is partially dependent on how we portray ourselves. Because us ‘kids’,” she even does finger quotes, “were younger when we turned it only makes sense for us to play the role. That does make it harder for us to stay too long, though, because people expect us to age – go to college, do that whole thing. We get to stay a little longer if we say we are a little older, but no more than 10 years or so, for the same reason.”

“Do you like moving?” Alice hums at my question, fingers tapping at the steering wheel.

“Yes and no. It is nice to pretend to be whatever I want. I can go to college and get every degree imaginable. But,” she pauses and her head tilts, “it can be hard for us to be somewhere and to actively not become attached to the people we are around. Especially if we see them every day.” Her smile is tired and she shrugs lightly. “But it is what it is. I’ve had the chance to meet some amazing people. I’ve also had the chance to meet some really bad people. It is all part of immortality.”

“It sounds incredibly lonely,” I say without thinking, and Alice lets out an amused breath.

“It would be incredibly more so if I didn’t have my family, but it can get lonely, for me anyway, since I am a social person.” She offers me a lopsided smile, “but now I have you and we are going to be the best of friends.” Her confident words causes happiness and something…lighter to bubble up in my chest and before I know it, I’m laughing.

“Are we now? You sound so sure!” She has adopted a wounded expression but her eyes sparkle with mirth.

“I am sure, I’ve seen it.”

“Ah, I had forgotten. You have premonitions.” I bite back more laughter, “and what if I make the decision for us not to be?” Alice tilts her head and hums in thought for a moment before turning back with a grin.

“Nope! Still best friends. Looks like no matter what you do you’re stuck with me.” Her words are teasing but there is a knowing glint in her eye that leads me to believe that she isn’t exactly joking.

“You may be happy with that,” I start, “but I doubt Rosalie will be. She doesn’t seem to like… anyone.”

“Ignore Rosalie, she make act and treat you like you are the scum of the earth that has dared cling to her designer heels, but deep, deep down she cares.” The look I shoot the dark-haired pixie can be considered nothing but skeptical. Alice sighs. “She does, really, she just has things that she needs to work through.” I drop the subject at Alice’s hesitant tone, it isn’t any of my business anyway.

Alice and I continue talking up to the point where she pulls into my driveway. We sit in silence when she shifts the car to park, not really looking at each other, the atmosphere almost awkward. So, I use my go-to ‘gee it is awkward, do something, anything to make it better’.

“Do you want to come in?” I blurt, words incredibly loud without the road noise. Alice offers me a small smile but shakes her head.

“Not today. You still need to text Edward that I took you home.” I had forgotten the reason why Alice and I had been driving in the first place. Some internal argument that had clearly caused a rift to form.

“Alice,” I say seriously, “why was Edward acting weird today?”

“That is something I’m sure Edward would like to discuss himself.” She offers with an apologetic smile.

“He didn’t seem happy when I met everyone today. Just tell me, is everything okay?”

“Edward is a very possessive vampire with a flair for the dramatic. Everything will be fine.”

“I’ve never seen him like that before, though.” Alice turns in her seat and our gazes meet.

“What has he told you of vampire nature?” I shrug and she sighs, “naturally. The simplest way to describe it is like having that devil on your shoulder. At the same time that is over simplifying it because our shoulder devil has immense control over us and we can lose ourselves completely to it if we don’t resist. Anyway, the little devil on our shoulder never goes away, it constantly sits on our shoulder and whispers in our ear all the things our vampire nature and instincts want us to do. But instead of hearing what he whispers we feel it, deep within us, as an urge that is incredibly difficult to ignore, some find it even impossible.”

“How do you? Ignore it, I mean.” I ask quietly, reluctant to interrupt.

“With lots of time and practice. We were all incredibly lucky to have Carlisle there, and the rest of the family by the time I joined, to guide us and help us. There are always accidents,” she says softly, sadly, “but it eventually gets better.”

“Will it ever go away?” I ask just as quietly.

“Carlisle would know better than anyone. He says that it is almost to the point where he doesn’t feel it – that he can ignore it completely. But he has said that vampires much older than him still experience it. Natural instincts never do go away, I guess.”

“And it is worse for Edward?” Alice heaves a sigh.

“No, he has better control than most of us. But it became worse for him today.” I tilt my head in question. “So, as I said, vampiric nature is like having a super-powered shoulder devil. Well, vampires are also animalistic by nature. You know, protective of territory, pack mates, food, etcetera.” I nod and she continues, “and as I said, Edward is possessive. So when you came around and other _vampires_ came around and were all friendly, the devil on Edward’s shoulder told him that we were encroaching. And so, he acted the way he did.”

“So it is something that will get better with time?”

“More than likely, just like with everything else, the first time you experience something is usually the strongest. He will be better prepared and, in time, his instincts won’t kick in. You’ll be free to come around and visit whenever you want and we will be able to hang out!” Her smile is more forced than normal and seems to be sad, for the life of me I don’t know why.

“You don’t seem happy about it.” I mumble quietly but she hears me perfectly.

“I am very happy!” Her tone is back to bubbly but I don’t believe it. “It might just be a while before he is comfortable with us hanging out, that is why I am sad.” She offers me a teasing smile, “best friends, remember?” I study her a moment looking for anything to indicate that something else is bothering her. Finding none, I nod.

“But of course. Is there anything I can do to help?” Alice’s face blanks for a moment or two and the she refocuses back on me with a small smile.

“You can discuss it with Edward when he comes over later tonight.” With that she unlocks the car doors and I take that as my cue to get out. I climb out of the Jeep and before I shut the door I look at her once more, some unknown force causing words to tumble from my mouth.

“Do you promise?” Her head tilts, expression akin to that of a puppy, in question. “To be best friends?” Her answering smile is blinding and causes my stomach to flip.

“Forever and always.”


End file.
